Monday, May 31, 2010
Please join me tomorrow, Tuesday, June 1, 2010 @12:00 noon EST (9:00AM PST), http://www.blogtalkradio.com/sandra-haymon for the episode, "Blending Old School Networking with Social Media." Do you have difficulty getting beyond the name tag? Want to become a power networker? My special guest, Dr. William Saleebey, author of "Connecting Beyond the Name Tag" and I will discuss fundamental differences between old school networking and current social media. Dr. Saleebey will also explain why individual differences are so important in understanding how we make connections with others.
You won't want to miss this episode.
Sincerely, Sandra-Caregiver Guru for he Caregiver Generatiojn
Sunday, May 30, 2010
Saturday, May 29, 2010
Friday, May 28, 2010
Thursday, May 27, 2010
Wednesday, May 26, 2010
Monday, May 24, 2010
Please join me Tuesday, May 25, 2010, 12:00 Noon (EST), 9:00 AM (PST) http://www.blogtalkradio.com/sandra-haymon
How do we, as caregivers, help heal the souls of those we care for? What part of our own soul connects with others and allows us to be a healing influence to all who come in contact with us?
According to Dr. Jose Rodriguez, Florida State University: "To touch, to listen, to care, and to love is to heal. To think, to learn, to teach, and to share is to heal." You won't want to miss this episode as my special guest, Dr. Rodriguez, discusses the passionate art of caregiving.
Dr. Rodriguez will share stories from his new book "HEAL--Humanism Evolving through Arts and Literature." Be prepared to allow healing to take place in your own soul as we explore how life, art, music and love heals.
Sandra - Caregiver Guru for the Caregiver Generation/Scroll down for You Tube Video
Sunday, May 23, 2010
Saturday, May 22, 2010
Thursday, May 20, 2010
This year 13.5 million people, 65 and older will fall. If you or a loved one experience a medical emergency, time is of the essence. That's where Philips Lifeline can help, connecting you to the right help for the situation, 24 hours a day, 365 days a year at the push of a button. Whether you need emergency services or just the assistance of a family member or friend to help you get back on your feet, we can help.
Wednesday, May 19, 2010
With the complexity of medications many seniors take, it's no surprise: 1 in 10 hospital admissions for seniors are a result of medication errors.* Philips Lifeline now offers a simple, proven Medication Dispensing Service that can help.
Philips provides an easy-to-use solution that helps maintain the proper medication schedule. Hear a simple audio reminder and at the push of a button, get your medications at the pre-programmed times.
Sound easy? It is—and it's effective. Philips Medication Dispensing Service has been proven to deliver a 98.6% in-home dispensing adherence level among monitored subscribers.
Visit:http://www.ManageMyPills.com to Learn More
Many caregivers report feeling as if they are drowning in the responsibilities of caregiving. However, you cannot save another person if you are drowning. Fifty percent of long-term caregivers will die before the person they are caring for. Why? Because they do not take care of themselves during the years they are taking care of others.
It is common for caregivers to get so focused on the person they are taking care of that they neglect their their own health. They fail to get annual physicals which might detect disease and illnesses in early stages. Many caregivers develop poor eating habits, fail to exercise, and gain excessive weight. In addition to stress and comfort eating, some caregivers say that they use alcohol to help them sleep or to self-medicate. Others report they start to smoke again after having quit for years prior to falling lot to caregiving.
Caregivers need to take care of themselves or they will have nothing left to give others. Here are some ways individuals may take better care of themselves and find greater balance in their lives while taking care of others.
First, take care of yourself physically through good health habits--exercise, maintain a healthy diet, lose excessive weight, confront addictions to caffeine, nicotine, sugar, alcohol and/or other drugs. The old adage “You are what you eat (drink, and smoke)” is true.
Our emotional and spiritual well being is directly intertwined with our physical health. Most emotional, as well as physical, health issues—depression, anxiety, insomnia, obesity, high blood pressure, diabetes, chronic fatigue, joint pain and a host of other illnesses are directly related to what we put into our bodies and how we treat ourselves.
Second, schedule your own physicals, check-ups, and regular medical exams, and commit to keeping these appointments.
Third, stay connected with extended family and significant others. Mend fences if needed.
Fourth, even if it's only for an hour a week, engage in a gratifying activity. Find a support group even if it is on-line.
And lastly, connect with your inner being. Take at least fifteen minutes each day to sit quietly and listen to your own inner voice, even if it requires that you get up fifteen minutes earlier. The pay-off will far outweigh the loss of a few minutes sleep.
We all have this wonderful gift--an internal mechanism that will guide us if we’ll take the time to pay attention to it. When we listen to the still, small voice within us, the choices we choose will make the caregiving process much easier and more enjoyable.
Remember the Law of the Harvest--plant good seeds. Scroll down for You Tube Video.
Sandra - Caregiver Guru for the Caregiver Generation
Several hours ago at 9:00 AM, Tuesday, May 18, 2010 I had the most interesting guest on my BlogTalkRadioShow (http://www.blogtalkradio.com/sandra-haymon). Sandy Wahl, Representative for Phillips LifelineCommunity Outreach and Our Family Services (email@example.com) came on to talk about the most amazing technology. Phillips Lifeline Medical Alert Service has just introduced to the market.
Phillips has created an Auto Alert pendant that can call for help even when the peron wearing it can't. Within 20-30 seconds after the person falls the Auto Alert pendant recognizes that the person has fallen, and is unable to push the call button. It automatically phones for help!
Phillips is the only company in the United States that offers this second layer of protection and the good news is that you can get this for only a few dollars more than the original lifeline--less than one fast food lunch a month!
Lifeline the #1 medical alert service:
* is trusted by thousands of hpospitals
* has helped more than 6 million people with the peace of mind and confidence to help maintin independent livng
* is recommended by over 65,000 healthcare professionals
This year 13.3 milion people 65 and over will fall, and half of them will not be able to get up by themelves. This blogpost is certainly not an infomercial for Phillips. It is, however, a very strong endorcement of a product and company that I totally support and highly recommend.
If there is any thought in your mind that you, or loved ones could benefit from such a service, I strongly urge you to call your local Phillips Lifeline Medical Alert representative and ask her/him to come out, perform an assessment, and help you make this "no-brainer" decision before it's too late.
I know from personal experience that the statistics about elderly folks falling is all too true. However, most families are in denial and wait until there is a broken hip, leg, neck, etc., before they admit that todays' technology not only offers them peace of mind, but could offer a higher quality of life for a much longer time--perhaps as long as they live.
Make a decision today that you won't regret. That's part of taking care of yourself. Scroll down for YouTube.
Sincerely, Sandra - Caregiver Guru for the Caregiver Generation
Tuesday, May 18, 2010
Anger is another emotion that is fear driven. Oftentimes, people express anger because it seems safer than expressing fear. Caregivers, especially women, report being angry about many things including:
- Angry that siblings don't help take care of their parents.
- Angry with herself for not confronting siblings and delegating part of the responsibilities.
- Angry that her parents didn't plan for "that day" sooner/better.
- Angry that she didn't see "that day" coming and better prepare for it.
- Angry at medical professionals.
- Angry that there are too many choices.
- Angry that there are not enough choices.
- Angry that it's "expected" that she delay her own life plans and cater to parents--while siblings continue with their lives uninterrupted.
- Angry that her job/career is compromised (ie., having to turn down promotions, or greater responsibilities, or fun projects that might require travel, or she might even have to quit her job to take care of her folks.)
- Angry that she has to use her sick leave and vacation time to take care of her folks.
- Angry that "no one understands" what she's going thru.
Female caregivers report extreme anguish over trying to:
- "please" her mother/father and trying to "please" her husband.
- the choice between moving her mom/dad in with her and disrupting her family life and moving her folks to a care facility, or allowing them to remain in their own home at the risk of serious consequences.
Although there are approximately 65 million caregivers in the United States, most caregivers report feeling lonely, isolated, and afraid. Eighty percent of caregivers are unpaid and care for a dependent adult seven days a week.
Fear driven emotions are often exaggerated when we are tired or have multiple life stressors. So, remember to take care of yourself. Your role as caregiver is but one of many roles. Other aspects of your life continue and there needs to be balance. I will share ways you might take care of yourself while caring for your elderly loved one(s) tomorrow. Scroll down for You Tube Video.
Monday, May 17, 2010
Here's a recent article I received fro her.
"Sometimes as caregivers, we try to protect the person in our care and to stay strong for everyone else in the family. We pretend that nothing is wrong even in the midst of very difficult situations. This isolates us—and our loved ones even more.
Instead, reach out and begin talking about how each of you is coping. Allow the person to share his or her emotions, even the loud and scary emotions.
Be still and listen with your full attention.
Turn off the phone and the television. Be present with your loved one’s suffering because as you listen, you help the person heal.
Then it will be your turn to speak your truth. Your fears and concerns are not a burden to your family but something that everyone is thinking and too afraid to speak out loud.
If your loved one’s medical condition has begun to worsen, or the process of dying has begun, ask what your loved one would like to have happen.
Include the individual in every way you can think of so he or she can retain some sense of control and power.
Imagine how hard it must be to know that your mind is going or to feel your body changing right before your eyes.
Even though you can’t control what is happening, one of the greatest gifts you can give your loved one is to hear his or her needs and wishes.
And then, each time you have to make a decision or to talk about life and medical choices, remember to start from your loved ones perspective.
I realize that watching your loved one suffer is difficult for you, the caregiver, but keep in mind how difficult it is for your loved one.
Perhaps you can be a little more patient or a little more respectful. Maybe before you lash out in frustration with the person you are caring for, you can stop, catch your breath and try to be more understanding, compassionate and kind.
I know you are human and you can’t be nice all the time. I know I have been frustrated and less than loving at times when taking care of my family members.
But, I also know we can strive to be better—not perfect, but better. It’s not easy, but we can choose to do a little better every day." Have a kind and respectful day. firstname.lastname@example.org
I hope you benefitted from this as much as I did.
Sandra - Caregiver Guru for the Caregiver Generation
The worst fear of all is the fear of living.
The majority of caregivers continue to be women, and often the youngest daughter falls lot to the responsibility of caring for her aging parents. Even when it's the husband's parents, the responsibilities associated with primary caregiving often get delegated to his wife--who may or may not work outside the home. Here are two of the five strongest and most frequently reported emotions experienced by caregivers secondary to caring for elderly loved ones.
Caregivers report being torn between the guilt of moving their loved ones from their home (placing them in a nursing home, Alzheimer's unit, or even an assisted living facility), and the fear of something awful happening to them should they be allowed to continue living alone. Guilt about placing a parent in a care facility is, perhaps, one of the most painful events in the life of adult children--especially the designated caregiver who is expected to take care of the parents. Here are other situations careivers report feeling guilty about:
- spending time with her parents and not with her own husband and family
- spending time with her husband and family rather than spending that time with her parent(s)
- taking away their car keys even when she knows they are no longer safe to drive
- that no matter what she does--it's never enough and never goo0d enough.
You get to decide when it's enough and when it's good enough. You also get to decide whether you'll continue to choose counter-productive emotions, which are fear driven , such as guilt, anger, anguish, and loneliness, or whether you'll liberate yourself from self-defeating thoughts and beliefs that keep you chained to the very depths of hell. The choice is all yours, but you aren't really free to make a choice as long as you stay on auto-pilot.
Tomorrow I will discuss the last three of the five strongest emotions expressed by caregivers--anger, anguish, and loneliness. I welcome your questions and comments. Scroll down for You Tube video
Sandra -Caregiver Guru for the Caregiver Generation
Sunday, May 16, 2010
One of the primary problems with fear is that it is negative. Therefore, decisions that are made from fear based emotions never serve us well. It's the Law of the Harvest. We cannot gain something positive from something negative any more than we can get corn when we plant potatoes.
Meanwhile, make a list of the five strongest emotions you've felt or are feeling about your role as caregiver. If you'd like to share them with me, just post them below or on my website: http//www.BabyBoomersSandwich.com, and I will be happy to address those specifically in my next blog.
Saturday, May 15, 2010
Our emotions (feelings) are not secondary to what has happened or what someone did or said, but rather what we tell ourselves about what has happened or what was said. We are not emotional victims of our environment.
If we don't like what we are feeling about something or someone, we can change those feelings by simply changing our thoughts, what we tell ourselves, what we believe--all or some of which may or may not be true.
Nothing and no one can make us feel angry, happy, sad, or any other emotion. Nor, can we make another person angry, happy, sad, etc.
The notion that we can make another person feel anything is omnipotent. And, the belief that others have the omnipotent power to make us feel is irrational thinking.
Just imagine what an insane world it would be if humans could control the emotional responses of others. We would all be mere puppets, waiting for someone to pull our strings to get a response. Our feelings and emotional responses would always be at the mercy of everyone and everything in our environment.
No one has power over another's emotions. We are all born with the wonderful ability to choose our feelings by choosing what we tell ourselves.
So it is with caregiving. You are free to choose to be angry and resentful that you have fallen lot to this role by telling yourself that it is not fair and you do not deserve to be burdened with such weighted responsibilities.
However, if you don't like being angry and feeling resentful you could tell yourself that the opportunity to care for other human beings and do for them that which they cannot do for themselves is an honor and a privilege offered to a select few.
Your emotional response would perhaps then change to feelings of compassion and empathy for the person you're caring for, and gratitude for the opportunity to learn and grow. Thank goodness no one can plant in our emotional garden but us. Scroll down for You Tube video
Sandra - Caregiver Guru for the Caregiver Generation
Thursday, May 13, 2010
In Baby Boomers I wrote about Patty and suggested she could be the Poster Child for Family Caregivers and the Sandwich Generation. The sandwich she's in more resembles a Dagwood Special than a simple boomer sandwich. Patty, like millions of you, is sandwiched between caring for her mother, a daughter still at home, working, planning for her own retirement, and now taking care of her husband.
For those of you who can well relate to the sandwich Patty's in, you might be happy to know there are many things you can do to lighten your load and lift your burdens.
The first thing is to recognize and accept that you have a choice about how you experience your role as caregiver. Caregiving is not inherently joyful, nor is it inherently burdensome. The entire process of caregiving is absolutely netural. You are wonderfully free to choose how you experience your role of caregiver.
I will be writing more about this during the next several days. Please remember to post your questions and comments. I truly want to know how I can help you and your loved ones as you take your turn!
Sandra- Caregiver Guru for the Caregiver Generation